weird feelings

these few day...
suddenly feel that i am a noob ,
act like a kids, no future, no hope.
what am i doing since these few days?
each of every of my friend they have a target, where is mine?
hahaa....totally din have any idea of it.
they are doing something for their future but what i am doing now?
why i can't be mature a bit.
i now is getting far and far from my friends topic..
maybe they have get to another stage of mature. but i am not. so can't join into the group.
this the problem that i know.
am i doing the right thing and decision for my future?
i am confusing on this.
always give people say that i am a negative person...
am i?
haiz...
i really want to change it and become a better person.
i really want to be.
i just can do my best for it...
pry for me -.-